Thanks Giving.

Let's be honest-- I've lacked inspiration these last coupld of months.  I don't think it's lost though, it's just tired. 

But there's something about being so blissfully in love-- in love with this beautiful place, in love with these extraordinary people-- that inspiration can't help but to notice.

And it seems only fitting that on this week of Thanksgiving I feel nothing but love and adoration. 

This place I live is beautiful, and I'm thankful for it every day.  Yesterday I sat with my greatest friend late into the night and watched the snow fall.  And I just sat and wondered how any one moment could be so perfectly whole and beautiful. 

These people I have are incredible and I am thankful that I have them every day.  We play in the snow and drink hot chocolate together.  Sometimes we have group hugs and I pray silently.  Sometimes I don't say much, mostly just thank you.  Thank you for giving me this much love.  Mostly I just ask that He'll let me feel so much love forever. 

But sometimes I say a lot and ask that He'll lead them towards all of their dreams, even the crazy ones, and that when they finally get there that it'll be just as beautiful as they had always imagined.  Or at least that it'll be as beautiful as this moment right now. 

And there is a lot to be thankful for. Like my clothes and my room and my car.  But the truth is, right now I don't really care because love is all you really need. And when I kneel down again tonight love is what I'll be thankful for.

-Linds

Hello August!

Today is the epitome of summer, I can just feel it. 

Let's go for a bike ride, eh?

8-5-11,

Be there.

-Linds.

Walking on a dream [song reference]

Well guys, I'm home now, I guess.  It doesn't feel quite right.  You know the days you feel like this?  Yeah, not today.  Today's more of a, "I may just pack up my bags, leave without saying goodbye (because goodbyes are just too darn hard and I always cry and they may just change my mind), and I may just never come back." Maybe it's just a case of the grass is always greener on the other side, I hear it's been going around.  

And amidst my thoughts & feelings of "what ifs" induced by a sheer lack of excitement this summer mixed with an ounce of fear for the future,

I thought:
What if I really did have the guts to leave?  What if I woke up tomorrow and ran?  Not in a cowardice way but in an adventurous "its time for a change" kind of way. 

But then I wondered:
Is there a difference between cowardice running and adventurous running?  Either way aren't we running from something?  Is there ever nobility in running? No, but what if I ran anyway?

And then I think:
What if I didn't always think so much?

The truth is that's my problem, or my power, I've never really been able to tell; I have too much baggage, too much to think about.  I think, as humans, we all do.  We have work, school, deadlines, and pressure.  We have responsibility and while, at times, I wouldn't mind leaving it behind, you have to look at both sides.  We have dreams, memories, family, friends, love, and  the truth is I could never leave because I could never leave all of that behind. 

Well, I guess I could to an extent, but I could never abandon it as fully as I'd need to just to survive one day alone.  I never could because whenever I'd go to buy Parmesan goldfish I'd see Cammie's face.  Whenever I'd smell chicken I'd think of Brayden.  Whenever I'd hear the name Unis, Lauren would come synonymously.  Then to top it off I'd hear How we do or Daylight and I'd start to tear up just at the thought. 

Thoughts of you, of him, of her, of us, would haunt me and I'd be right back with a case of the grass is always greener.


Then I'm  blessed again
because thoughts of Cammie, Brayden, Lauren, and Bree are making me smile.

And I remember:
Running is always running, hiding is always hiding, and someone else's problems are always less intimidating than your own.  Then again, maybe they aren't.

Then I think:
The grass may be greener on the other side, but it's just as hard to mow.


-Linds